While I do the dishes I like to order my little minions around.
Easy things, like "pick up that toy", "put your shoes away", or "stop finger painting on the floor with the almond butter"-yes, that one is real. They groan and whine like every other little kid but they usually do it.
Well one day Alex was having a particularly hard time following directions and just WOULD NOT pick up her shoes and put them away.
I told her once.
I told her twice.
I literally told her 10 times (and that is a literal use of the word literally, not an "I literally cleaned the whole house today"-a regular of mine), and she still didn't budge.
Finally I yelled "PICK UP YOUR SHOES AND PUT THEM AWAY!"
This is when Alex would usually pucker out that bottom lip and summon her fake tears like only she can and say something like
"you had to be nice to me mom, no yedding (yelling)" with that little repremanding finger pointed at me and stomp up to her room.
To my surprise she took it in stride and said
"ugh fine. ROBOT!...ROBOT? Where is he? Ugh if my robot was here he would do it!"
I chuckled against my will.
"You don't have a robot"
And she replied in the clearest tone of 'well, duh' I have ever heard,
"We'll den I guess you should get one for me"